It Does Beat Scissors
}} Belkar settles in to his role in the gladiator pit. Cast * Roy Greenhilt ◀ ▶ * Belkar Bitterleaf ◀ ▶ * Evisceratus ◀ ▶ * Reddish Lizardfolk Gladiator ◀ ▶ * Unshaven Gladiator ◀ ▶ * Gladiator with Red Hair ▶ * Notseenicus ▶ Transcript Lizardfolk Gladiator: Come on! He's three feet tall! Unshaven Gladiator: He's right! We're all unarmed in here, we should be able to overpower him. Evisceratus: Yeah! You're going down, you little creep! Belkar whistles Belkar: ♪ Belkar picks up a pebble and smiles. Unshaven Gladiator: Crap! Notseenicus: Look out! Lizardfolk Gladiators: He's got a pebble! Evisceratus: What? Gladiator with Red Hair: Run! Evisceratus: What the hell is wrong with you? Someone grab his legs. Unshaven Gladiator: Don't you get it? He's a halfling. WITH A PEBBLE. Evisceratus: So what? Unshaven Gladiator: "So what?" Do you know how many bonuses he could have with a thrown rock? Lizardfolk Gladiator: I heard a halfling once poked out both of a guy's eyes with the same sling stone! Notseenicus: I knew a guy whose cousin was hit by a rock thrown by a halfling. Three month later, he was eaten by a tiger! Unshaven Gladiator: I'm outta here. Lizardfolk Gladiator: I'd rather take my chances in the arena! Notseenicus: At least we'd be armed. Evisceratus: Get back here, you cowards! Belkar: There may be no halfling lands here, but our awesomeness precedes us. Roy: Don't you have better things to do that harass the locals? Belkar: Not really. I would be digging a tunnel to freedom and covering it with a poster of Lidda, but you put the kibosh on escaping. Roy: Still, I thought you turned over a less bitter leaf. So much for helping out, I guess. Belkar: Oh, I am helping. I'm helping maintain the structure of civilization. Roy: ...OK, see, I want to let that go without comment, but no. It's too much. Explain. Belkar: Well, I've been thinking about why all these human countries lock people up. And I see now that it's not just about sending the people you don't like to jail. Belkar: (Though that part is hilarious.) Belkar: It's also about scaring all the other people with the threat of going to jail. Belkar: So anything that makes the prison experience more miserable—such as getting your only food stolen by a ruggedly handsome halfling— Belkar: —should serve to reduce crime in the long run! Belkar: Face it: Me being a total jackass is an important part of the corrections process! Roy: Personally, I favor corporal punishment. Here, I'll show you. D&D Context * Lidda is an iconic character in D&D, introduced in D&D 3.0 Edition (for example, she is used in Player's Handbook to illustrate her class). She is a female halfling rogue. * Halflings in D&D have a +1 racial bonus to thrown objects and slings as well as +2 to the Dexterity ability, which may give further bonuses to thrown objects. Trivia * The title refers to the zero-sum game hand game, Rock–paper–scissors, where rock (such as the pebble Belkar holds) beats scissors. * Belkar's line, "I would be digging a tunnel to freedom and covering it with a poster of Lidda" in Panel 7 refers to the Stephen King's 1982 novella Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption (and its 1994 movie adaptation The Shawshank Redemption). In it, the protagonist digs a tunnel out of his jail cell, hiding the entrance under a poster of Rita Hayworth (and, later, other actresses). * This is the first appearance of the gladiator with red hair and Notseenicus (the kobold gladiator). External Links * 745}} View the comic * 167556}} View the discussion thread Category:Roy and Belkar Become Gladiators